Embodying the full fempreneur spirit means that you are going against the grain and that isn’t easy. By surrounding yourself with the right accountability partners you have the power to make the difference you want in your own life.
Accountability and discipline are the two hardest parts of being a fempreneur. As soon as you launch out on your own, it is up to you to keep yourself motivated towards your goals. Strong accountability partners will take you further toward those goals than you can ever imagine.
We are the sum of the five closest people to us.
The importance of having the right people in your life.
I shared in the Launch Kit that I received advice about my ten year goals and intentionality from the amazing Russo Guows. Following that session with her, I started to think about who is in my life and the importance of shaping my network and closest friends to ensure they are supportive and challenge me to be better, in the best possible ways.
Brene´ Brown also has some great advice in Rising Strong, some of which she shares in this article on who to avoid in your life. Don’t worry she talks about who is good too.
What I have learned and started to observe is that we are the sum of the five closest people to us. The individuals that are closest to us in our life are the one’s that shape our values and behaviors.
Even if you have strong values and an understanding of who you are, you can get stuck if you don’t have people around you that are not only supportive, but challenge you to be smarter and help you to thrive.
It’s a hard truth, but one that can transform your life. Surround yourself with the right tribe and you will become better. Intentionality starts with your dreams and gets furthered with those around you.
Finding the right people.
There are different groups of people in your life, including your partners in life (spouses, dates, family members), your friends, and partners in business.
You have control over who is in all three of these groups and who you let into your closest circles. It is possible to keep a family members in your life, for example, but not share your dreams and secrets with them because you they have expressed themselves in one of the toxic ways Brene´ suggests in the article above.
It’s up to you who you let in. Truly, it is. You are worth it. You can create the right tribe for you.
When it comes to launching your own business and tackling the world as a fempreneur, there are five specific traits you should look for in your accountability partners. You may have partners that play different roles within these five, bonus if you find someone who embodies all five.
One thing I know for sure though, is that you should never have someone in your life that makes you feel lesser, unworthy, or believes you do not have the abilities to meet your goals. You deserve better than that, femp.
The 5 Things To Look for In Your Accountability Partners
If you are the sum of the five people around you, wouldn’t you want those five people to be smarter than you? Think about it. Have people around you that know their shit and you will get to know your’s too. Having smart friends and business partners is like getting a Ph.D. without spending the hours in the classroom and reading textbooks. Having people around you that are smarter than you also helps you want to be better and always continue learning. This is a great mindset to always have. Never stop learning.
Surround yourself with people that hold the same values as you. Differing opinions are good, you don’t want to fall into groupthink, but you do want the people around you to treat people in the same ethical way you do. You want to share with them the same larger values you hold of free thinking, strong emotional intelligence, and intercultural competency, just to name a few possibilities. Sharing these types of values — even if you may hold different spiritual beliefs or manage your money differently — ensures that you are all looking to move your community or the world forward in the same, healthy ways.
You want people in your life that challenge your thinking and push you to be better, but with kindness. You don’t want everyone around you to blow smoke up your ass, you want your tribe to be able to hold you accountable in a way that works for you, in a way that doesn’t bring you down. Kindness paired with constructive feedback is the best way to support improvement in your friends, family, and colleagues.
You want people around you that support you, in a cautious way. Never keep someone in your life that tells you that you can’t do something. But always keep the friends and family around that get excited about your dreams, but don’t let you purchase a herd of unicorns because “they are the future for horses.” You want support that doesn’t lead you astray, but you need support and affirmation from those who surround you.
Courage is an elusive trait. Courage is the characteristic that gives someone the ability to speak up when it isn’t the easiest to or talk to someone directly about how they are feeling or if they are challenged by something someone in their life is doing. If I’ve learned anything in my life, it is that passive attempts at solving a problem or gossiping only cause more harm than good. Have people around you that are courageous enough to speak directly to you, are courageous enough to lean into their fears and try new things, that are courageous enough to speak out about injustices in the world. Courageous people will always make the difference.
Setting healthy boundaries and letting people in that are smart, kind, supportive, courageous and hold strong, positive values is a great way to hold on to those traits yourself. It is very true that you are the sum of the five closest people to you. Think about who you surround yourself with and who you let into the most vulnerable times in your life. Having accountability partners that support and challenge you in the right ways will give you the power you need to build and sustain a business that works for you and is successful.